morP:

[Forrest]

Okay, yeah I went to morP. Didn't have a date, didn't want one. Anyway, here's my point:

MORP FUCKING RULED
They played DANCE COMMANDER!!! Holy shit you guys, I have never kicked more ass in my entire life than I did when all those rap-fools cleared the dance floor and it was just os awesome folks. I was kicking ass all over the dance floor. AND THE PLAYED GUNTHER! AHHHH!!!
You guys all missed some ass-kickery. Seriously. I was commanding the dance, with Asa as support, from the sidelines. We just did poses and held them and then we'd switch poses every few seconds. "arms crossed in 1, 2, 3. hold "hands on vest 1, 2, 3" hold et cetera. There were many pictures taken of us, as well. I think my commandery will be yreabookified. We also danced to some of the rap stuff. It was sweet. We stood next to people we didn't know, back to back, and started moving our left legs up and down un unison, doing the "techno headbang." God you guys, it ruled. Seriously, you all missed some kickass stuff. The majority of the music was shit, como lo normal, but Dance Commander and the Ding Dong Song made up for 4 years of shitty dances. I'll stop now before your heads all explode.

[Snox]

That was pretty rockin.
Günther was a definite hit. A must re-play.

ahhh good times.

[Justin Leedy]

I didn't go, I had a gig with the SG Operators at the Powerhouse and a date with Hannah (same thing) and I really didn't want to go to a stupid dance.

[Forrest]

I understand passing up the dance for that. You did miss out, even if you were with Hannah. Had you been able to, you should have been there. But you weren't so it doesn't matter.

[Schmitt Industries Inc.]

We'll show you pictures of me as Guenther, and with lots of girls around me for The Ding Dong Song, I dunno if anybody actually got pictures of me headbanging dancing though....Plus we'll show you other pictures of us bein' jackasses.

[Forrest]

Speak for yourself. I am no jackass. As for the girls, I must have missed that. Maybe I was too busy kicking everybody's ass, and they were too busy liking it, to notice. Sorry man, you can't face up to the Dance Commander when you're at a dance.

[Snox]

A short while before 1 day ago.. I went to a dance. Not just a dance, a backwards dance. Backwards of the popular, end of term (that sounds much cooler than "year") dance in which the fine ladies, swap roles with the hopeful young gentlemen. The ladies approach a man of their desire, tempt them with a bit of a flirt, and implore for their hand in a swaying romp through the tiled mystery-land of dance-floor. If the young man, accepts the ever so anxious invitation, a spike of glee may spark through the fingertips of ye lassie. If the hand is declined, the young lady shall continue 'till a yes is answered, or gives up in shame. Then there are the those who wing it. Let it flow like a refreshing winter breeze. Go freestyle, and pick up a partner on the spot. The daring, the brave, the lionhearted wanderers of time. —— The clock strikes nine. Nine strikes of the clock and the music starts, but the dancing does not. One person on a dance floor is foolish. Two is embarrassing. Until a group decides to go at once, the floor has no partners. Quite some time it takes before the feet begin a-moving. In the mind of the dancers, they are not moving as one, but a unit with many arms. Appendages of style, but sometimes clumsy. The Dance-floor's left hand. Posing on the side line, is the dance commander. Commanding the dance with his super-imposing grace. Some may laugh at the silhouetted figure in the background, and some may smile, but they are noticed by all, large and small, powerful and tall. Behind a table of many dials and switches are the masters of songs, and light. A press of a button, and a flick of a switch, flows one song, into another. Lights going in and out of many colours and varieties. These are the D.J.s. Then there are the few, and at times the many, that sit on the side and just gaze into the mass. Watch with wonder, watch with disgust. The too shy or feeble are here. The observers. Motivation can also be derived from the attire of the attendee. With dazzling colours and style, some go all out and for a good time. Others, come in with their street clothes, but with lacking style, lacks grace. Impressment is diminished and the overall effect is lowered. The clock strikes 12. 12 strikes of the clock and the music stops. A blinding light arcs across the dance-floor. In groups they vanish, the dancers of time. 3 hours of swaying, flowing, and jerking to the beat. At last they are gone, waiting for their next time to come, to choose or be choose for a hand at dance. A hand at dance. This is the backwards dance. This is morP.

as posted in my LiveJournal
( I really shouldn't be allowed to write this late at night.)

[Justin Leedy]

Wyatt, the Dance Commander is far more essential to a dance than all that. You make it sound like these people just woke up knowing what to do on a dance floor. WRONG! Without Forrest there to command them, they drift in chaos. But with his wise commanding, they dance.

[Forrest]

Seriously Wyatt, have you ever been to a dance I'm not at? I have seen pictures. There is no fun. I have never seen a picture of a happy person at a dance I'm not at. That might be because I only missed one dance. I was playing D&D last year during homecoming. I was not yet the Dance Commander, however, or rather I had not discovered my abilities.. my calling you might say. I assume people made due without me, because none of us had any idea what my presence did. I cannot imagine that any dances after this year will be enjoyable. Maybe slightly enjoyable, since I will be leaving a few deputies behind (you know who you are) and sending a few to other places (look out Gonzaga! Justin the Danc Deputy is ont he way!). The dances will at least have soem sort of direction to them and will not devolve into a massive pile of confused, squirming bodies. I have seen it happen. It's terrible. A dance without a leader is like dinner without children- all too common and terrbily unfortunate. I will come to my point:

Adopt-a-Disco:

if you would like to help these poor, lost dancers, you can send a donation of 4 (four) to the Dance Commander so that I may train a new deputy. That's right. You need only send me a meager 4 (four) to save an entire Disco. You will periodically be sent pitures and letters from your adopted Disco, expressing it's thanks and the thanks of it's occupants. You will be given a free 27.58 (twenty-seven-point-five-eight) (unit of time) pass to enter your adopted Disco. This is your opportunity to save one Disco, to stop the suffering of the occupants of one Dance Battlefield, to stop the suffering for once and for all. For contributions, simply send me, the Dance Commander, an Instant Message containing the sum of 4 (four), so that I may begin the process of Disco-savery.

[Schmitt Industries Inc.]

I was at Homecoming last year, it was nothing compared to the dances Forrest has been at, I don't really know where this enourmous supply of awesome comes from, but it has to be his gut or something....

[Schmitt Industries Inc.]

But of course, the only way Forrest can be truly complete in his knowledge of the dance is if he were to add knowledge of Karate to his repitiore.

[RACHEL!]

Forrest, I missed it! I went over to Tony's house and we watched SPIDERMAN 2, which was [not] awesome! Well, hanging out with Tony was cool, but the movie was not so good.

Anyway, I'm sorry I couldn't witness you ruling. But by golly, I believe it.

[YETI]

looks like someone is reading a bit too much maddox

(ahem, forest)

[Forrest]

I haven't been there for a while. I suppose I do draw some of my.. ah.. narciccistic inspiration from there.. mainly from myself and from Electric Six, however. I will not go into the fine points of the differences between my sense of humor and his. I don't care if a copy his style a little bit. It's a good style. I'll admit to using some of his.. ah.. techniques.. I guess.. because they are good. And funny.

[Schmitt Industries Inc.]

So Forrest, what prompted you to decide to assume the mantle of the infamous Dance Commander?

[niko]

kodiak dances..so differnt from the ones here.

[Justin Leedy]

OK, I'll ask. So what are they like down there, Nic?